Short Story: The Fat Murican Gets Karma!
Once upon a time, there was a fat Murican who lived in New Jersey named Blob Blabbersky who was a very fat moron. He was so sick of American culture left and right, feeling that America was the source of all evil. He was ashamed to be an American and wanted to migrate to the Philippines and become a Filipino.
He one day went to the Philippines for a few days. Later on, he joined the group called Get Real Philippines where he did nothing but troll everyone.
One day, a person posted a post on progressing the Philippines and showing how Singapore had become progressive. He trolled the person and said that he would kill himself if he had to follow all those rules, he showed remorse for the death of Flor Contemplacion who really committed murder and said that Filipino culture makes life worth living such as defending guilty citizens, where there are no penalties for littering and the like saying that he loves the culture of the Philippines so much even if it must remain dirt poor as he thinks it's blessed are the poor.
Later he would also rant about how America is the source of all evil while he contradicted himself. He even said he would rather trust the criminals than the cops saying that cops kill for no reason while criminals kill for a reason. He said that the Philippines is a holy, righteous country even if he had stated many times he hates rules. In short, he always contradicted himself for his own convenience.
Soon he moved to Imperial Manila where he felt he was happy. He arrived at the NAIA and started dancing and frolicking, believing he had escaped the "oppression of America". No sooner did he find a place to stay and he started enjoying the Philippines because he could litter and not get caught, jaywalking was hardly punished and there were a lot of people who thought like he did.
One day he decided to explore more of Manila and ride the MRT. However he was so fat that he could not fit in. Even the lines were made more burdensome than usual due to his extremely high obesity. He badmouthed everyone and said it was a free country. As that went on, everybody got so annoyed they banded together and threw him off. The MRT left leaving him behind causing him to throw a tantrum - realizing that the Philippines wasn't really paradise after all.